059| WHY I LOVE YOU IS SO HARD TO SAY
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IH059 - Why I Love You is So Hard to Say
“I love you” is a seemingly simple phrase that says so much yet is sometimes hard to hear or hard to say. Recently, my father-in-law headed in for open-heart surgery and—on one of his many preoperative phone calls with my wife and I—he mentioned the number of calls he was receiving from well-wishers, and how he was not used to other men saying “I love you.” It was clear that instead of giving comfort, these three words were, in fact, doing the opposite. So, why is it that so many people struggle to hear them?
In today’s episode, I share my thoughts on why “I love you” is hard to say, why many people default to not saying the words at all, and the significance for those who adjust them slightly to say simply “Love you.” I reveal modern society’s perhaps greatest personal problem and how it spurs a myriad of other, larger problems, including social media fixation, drug and alcohol addiction, obesity, broken homes, and more. I discuss the many ways that these words are jarring and how it makes us not want to say them or hear them. I also suggest considering saying “I love you” as a simple way to say “I care about you.”
“The words ‘I love you’ are jarring for many of us; jarring in our conflict of how we feel about the other or ourselves; jarring about what the words mean; jarring in our readiness to accept the unspoken terms of the deal.” - Chris Colbert
This week on Insert:Human
The significance of truncating “I love you” to “Love you”
How the lack of self-love, self-esteem, and self-confidence are the most significant mental illnesses facing modern society
How the “I” in “I love you” presents as a non-negotiable proposition
The different types of love and what they mean
The mutual responsibility of “love” as a word and its implied value exchange
Why changing the statement to “I care about you” might just prevent a lot of confrontation and confusion
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